Goundhog Day

It_s_Groundhog_Day_all_over_again___

2015. It wasn’t the greatest of greats. High and lows. Sighs and blows. Part of the journey in life that you wish you never had to experience. For it is the day of Groundhog, and for I feel is a perfect one for me to start on my journey. Screw the past and screw the future, for now it is the present, and that is all that matters.

The last day I posted was exactly a year and three weeks ago today, which is a huge miscarriage. For life is to be lived and known, not hidden away and ignored. For this be a great day, one without promises, but instead, one with want.

For that time which I have allowed you, allow me my own to pursue my own day and life, for the tradition of the blog I must bid you farewell and to be good, but if that is impossible, to stay out of trouble!

ND: Sky did an awesome 24-hour (well more like 18-hour) back-to-back marathon of the movie on this day. It was awesome and also boring as hell… after the sixth film!

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Feels

While readers of this blog are well aware of what kinds of things I talk about, they are not aware of everything, like such as what I refuse to.

Expression of feelings for me, is an almost alien concept, one which I’ve never fully understood and have doubts about whether or not I ever will. While I’m not necessarily and emotionless robot, it wouldn’t be a inaccurate conclusion as in short, I never talk about my “feelings”.

Feels… everywhere!

The reason behind this, I think, is largely because as a being which takes much pride in thinking about the world logically, that something such as emotions, which can cloud ones judgement and cause friction between parties, is illogical.

Using this reasoning, I often prefer to “bottle up” emotions and only really show them in explosive outbursts, which are a direct result of my stoic outlook on life.

Not only do I find emotions illogical and irrelevant, I often have trouble figuring out why I have them and sometimes wonder if I have a mental health issue or something.

I am certainly aware that I have a moderate case of insomnia (which has led me to write this) and some anxiety issues, but I don’t quite exactly know if I have a certain disorder or if I am just being hysterical.

I really need to book an appointment with the doctor and see if I can get referred as this is really messing with me now as I recently got crewed over as a result of it.

I hope to go over this more in the coming weeks as I’ve merely scratched the surface.

Anyone got any advice, feel free to leave it in the comments!

Sal.

Reintroduction

Yeah, I haven’t blogged in while, almost a year (11 months), but that has more to do with free time than anything else.

I suppose the usual content of this blog is to document my “busy” life and as an outlet to express my hopes and feeling.

One of the main reason I stopped was due to writers block, and the fact that as a result, it was interfering with my education.

Although, with that said, I’ve been out of education for about 10 months now, and I’ve done so little, there hasn’t really been much to document.

I could bore you with the most depressing Christmas of my life, how I can’t seem to get a job or suspicions of having Tourettes, but who the hell would want to hear about that? Not me.

As it is approaching the summer, I am looking forward to it very much, although I am currently held back this spring by on any exploratory note, due the being unable to cycle anywhere.

I’ve started to relearn Esperanto about 3 months ago, giving concentration the past month, and I already feel quite confident in understanding correlatives.

Last week, in fact, I started (re)learning some vocabulary, which is something I really lack in regard to the language.

One who can speak words but have no grammar is more advantaged that one with little vocab and all the grammar rules. That is not to say Esperanto grammar is hard, but you know what I mean.

I’ve also restarted learning to program, which struck a hiatus for some time.I hope to have grasped PHP by the end of the year!

 

Well apart from that and emotional issues, the craic is good!

 

Nuff said.

Sorry, but FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I’m sorry for getting behind on my blog posting. I missed posting yesterday, but that’s no biggie, who cares.

After posting some lengthy articles I’ve been getting bored due to it taking a lot of my time away from things and also occupies my mind all day, so it’s very hard for me to do work.

Coupled with this is the lack of views I’ve been getting which has been a bit shit,but fuck that. I never made this blog to get views or recognition, I made it to have somewhere, (that’s not Facebook) to voice my views and thoughts and to see others peoples perspectives.

I hope to continue with some more news articles in the future. I’m no journalist (actually an IT studento), but I do find it fun picking bits out of stories and adding my own little twist.

With all this said, I think I may resort to only having a few posts a week. If that becomes a pain, I shall make that once. In the past, I’ve stopped myself from posting more than one article a day, but I might stop this as it’s a little dumb. I doubt this will affect anyone as no one reads this thing, it seems, but I felt I had to get it out there.

Trust me, I’ll post some interesting things in the next coming weeks. More of my elusive photography, some poetry maybe and possibly some humour if I can be asked.
As an end note, I would like to thank those lovely 10 people who have followed me, it’s very nice to know that people find my pot that interesting, that they want to subscribe. Cheers 🙂

A mini rap, my myself. ©

I don’t really have much to talk about today, but this is something I just wrote.
© ThouShallNotParse.

All this power and this chaos around me everyday;
I get sick of it all, when my work don’t pay.

I got the man and machine staring down at me now;
I’m wondering how, their scheming is allowed.

If revolution is the message, when will it come;
must I mobilise myself, or my daughter & son?

I ask this question without pain or commission;
The decision or position, isn’t my mission.

I love my mother, and my family too;
But if I had the choice, I would throw a shoe.

Topple Dictators who run this place;
the sole will hit him, slam bang in his face.

Remember, Remember!

There’s nothing special about this man they talk about;
He’s on the news everyday with the shit they spot.

From the land that thinks that they’re the greatest;
The truth in fact, is that they’re just racists.

They go to other lands to spread their lies;
All they care about is the oil which the consumer buys.

Laughable how people really believe their shit;
It makes me want to throw a cocktail full and lit.

I must leave now for higher places;
No not heaven but to retrieve my laces. 😀

© ThouShallNotParse.

Post name? God knows

If you can probably tell by my inability to come up with a reasonable title, I am pretty lazy today which was mainly down to despite deciding to get up early-ish for a change, my day was ruined by my dad heaving all of the contents of his van through the house causing dust to circulate giving an silvery musk of a taste in the air with the most awful smell attached to thereof.

I continued my James Bond marathon, well until Sky stop showing them at least. I watched The Spy Who Loved Me, a film which I realised 10 minutes in, that I’d seen most of it already. I fast forwarded it, as you do, to about 30 minutes of the end, which was quite fun I think. It felt like an achievement, almost.

After which I decided on connecting my Xbox 360 to the sitting room TV, which it full HD was a utterly amazing spectacle. I’ve never seen it being used in such good quality. That said, as I hadn’t connected it to the internet in well over a year, updates took over an hour to download and update, with at least 5 restarts. While waiting, I connected up the Mega Drive (yes, to a HD TV) and played Sonic the Hedgehog, which I got a lot more enjoyment out of than The Godfather game, which I set out to play.

This would be the first time in many months that I have actually sat down and played my Xbox. I’ve (hilariously) been called anti-social for not playing it enough, but to be honest, it gives me more pain than enjoyment. Computer games are boring in today’s world. It makes me wonder how the big games company’s struggle to compete with retro, as in many cases, it’s far better.

I haven’t been cut off from gaming fully, as on occasion I play Facebook games (my mother makes me, I promise) and the Empire and Napoleon games in the Totals War series. Unlike a lot of kids my age when I started college, I had not interest in games programming. It honestly never struck a chord with me. Mind you, a lot of those who were so eager, had never programmed before and/or were terrible at maths.

From looking at my options more openly, I’m getting more interested in Web Design/Dev, mainly due to me finding it generally simple and easy. I’ve been teaching myself JavaScript using many internet sources since before the summer, and I started in on python possibly as far back as 2008.

But this isn’t a post of computer games of programming or jobs, but just about general life. What is life? What’s its meaning? What is the true purpose? Who really knows, and in today’s demanding world, who really cares?

 

Well my lovely readers, Be good, and If you can’t be good, stay out of trouble! 😀

Stuff I forgot to blog about

So yeah. Yesterday I was basically going to blog about things which happened, but somehow I didn’t. This could have been due to sheer forgetfulness – to which I am long accustomed to, being too lazy or the fact that I hadn’t actually finished what I set out to do for the day.

My bedroom window faces westerly. At around 5am everyday, the moon sets to the south-east, and some nights (mornings) in which I am struck with insomnia, I like to watch.

For the past few day, the moon has cast a magical glare over the landscape. A shadowy blue tint illuminating all that falls within its path. Like the night before, the beautiful image which I captured at the same time with my compact, I planned to do again, but with my Canon T70 35mm instead.

The only issue I found with this was, that I was so tired from my eventful day, that I completely forgot and fell asleep around half 2. I eventually woke up at 8am, like I often do on weekdays (except today was a Wednesday, so I normally wouldn’t need to get up anyway). I was gutted when I realised it was bright outside and not a single trace of the moon. Just clouds clouds everywhere, not a single illuminatus.

But what exactly did I do. Well after crudely awakening at 12pm, I had breakfast, the usual, then decided to go to town at 3pm, weirdly. Spent most of my day scourging charity shops hunting down some cheap as chip electrical goods. Hopefully old radios or phone gear. I did find a pair of mini-tape answering machines which I found particularly interesting.

I was in Oxfam Books actually, which was where I found an old school ‘Colloquial’ language book. The one is particular, being for Levantine Arabic. As soon as I saw it, I knew I had to buy it. The rarity of these books is silly. Especially the older ones. Looking at the reviews on amazon, it seems to a pretty rubbish book with a mere 100 pages, a third of the majority of the books in the series, but I did not buy it to learn it, especially not now anyway.

If I ever was to learn a language of the middle east, first I would have to tackle possibly either standard Arabic or Egyptian Arabic, the latter being the most widely understood. Standard Arabic, from what I’ve heard, is very hard to learn, almost like Classical Latin or Sanskrit. But I’ll leave the lectures on linguistics for another day.

The real reason I went to town, you should know if you read my previous post, was to buy some 35mm film. Word must have caught on from this, as when I arrived, they were almost cleared out. I planned on buying up to 20 rolls, but when I arrived, there were merely 9, two of which were already opened. Instead of taking which ever one on the basis of least damaged, I decided to take all 9. With 2 pint cartons of milk for a pound, what a bargain at a tenner.

I then retired to home at just after 4pm. The sound of the market square clock tower alerting me as soon as I stumbled upon it’s steppes. The four consecutive rings almost generate a classical English market town feel. I gentle scroll through some market stalls selling almost junk, turned up nothing but rust covered hands. At home, with film in hand, I loaded my camera and took some delightful snaps of some chem trails and a glider.

I wish I could have more days like this. Sadly today was a cold and wet day – the Irish in me permits me to call it very soft. It got worse later on, with actual hail. Coupled with my near-retarded neighbour setting off fireworks in the midst of it all. All it made was a horrible noise and a light spark. But oh well. There’s always tomorrow.

Tomorrow Never Dies, or so I’m told.